I’ve had to completely start over at 52 years old—financially, mentally, emotionally—and some days, it feels like I’m running out of time. If you’ve ever wondered how to deal with feeling behind in life in your 50s, or just want to know you’re not the only one crying into a pint of Ben & Jerry’s… this one’s for you.
When Life Feels Too Overwhelming
I almost didn’t want to write this post. Talking about the hard stuff isn’t always easy—especially when it makes you feel exposed. But something kept nudging me, and I figured if I’m feeling this way, other women probably are too.
So here it goes: I’ve been feeling behind in life lately. Big time.
I’m 53, and after a year of major changes, I feel like I’m starting over after 50 in just about every area of my life—finances, mental health, my career, and even my sense of joy. And honestly?
It’s overwhelming.
Feeling the Pressure in My 50s
There’s a pressure that comes with being in your 50s and realizing you haven’t achieved what you thought you would by now. The clock feels louder. The goals feel further away. And the self-doubt? Oh, it’s showing up like an uninvited guest at every life event.
This past week, that pressure really got to me.
It didn’t just live in my head; it showed up in my body and mood, in the way I moved through the world. Even something as simple as my morning walk, which normally brings me peace, felt like a chore. The crisp morning air didn’t help. I wasn’t excited to get outside. I was dreading it.
Negative Thoughts and Feeling HEAVY
The feeling of being behind in life is heavy. It doesn’t just affect one area—it trickles into everything. I started stressing about money, about not having enough time to do the things I still want to do in this life. That stress snowballed into other negative thoughts. Suddenly, I was focusing on everything I disliked: the town I live in, my house, the weight I haven’t lost, and how much I miss my friends.
Finding joy this week was tough. It felt like I had spiraled into a mental fog that I couldn’t shake. I found myself asking questions like, “Why is this happening now?” and “Why do I feel so stuck?”
How Social Media Makes Me Feel Behind in Life
I try to stay mindful of what I consume, but I recently started posting on my personal Facebook profile again. Which meant… yes, the “doomscrolling” crept back in. And no matter how carefully I tried to curate my feed, the comparison trap was waiting for me.
I saw people living lives I used to live—going to ball games, hiking in beautiful forests, spending time with friends. And I couldn’t help but think, “What did I do wrong that I’m here, starting over after 50, while everyone else seems to be moving forward?”
It hurt.
My YouTube Channel Setback
Adding to the pile, my YouTube channel took a dip. I lost a few subscribers and my views were way down. It might sound small, it’s rather discouraging to pour yourself into something for little to no positive results. It made me question whether I was on the right path at all.
And then came the spiral. Again.
When you’re already feeling behind in life, every little setback feels like proof that you’ll never catch up. And the negative thoughts begin to race in my head! “I missed my friends. I felt lonely. I started craving comfort food (hello, Ben and Jerry’s Brownie Fudge).” And of course, after eating that, I felt guilty. I wanted to work out, but I had no energy.
This cycle kills creativity. It makes it hard to show up, to work, to even think clearly.
How to Deal with Feeling Behind in Life in Your 50s
After a couple of days of feeling sorry for myself, I knew I had to face this head-on. As my mom used to say, it was time to “get my head out of my own ass”.
Here’s what helped me snap out of the spiral:
1. I stopped scrolling. Without disappearing from Facebook completely, but I cut back big time. I stopped the endless scroll and only checked in briefly. Within a few hours, I noticed a shift in how I felt.
2. I forced myself to move. I took that dreaded walk, even though I didn’t want to. And after that, I took my work to Starbucks. Getting out of the house, being around people, even strangers, gave me a little spark.
3. I gave myself permission to reset. Sometimes, you need a little time to feel your feelings. But then you have to move forward. And moving forward doesn’t have to be dramatic. It can be small steps: a walk, a hot coffee, a quiet moment where you decide to keep going.
4. I remembered that starting over after 50 isn’t a failure. It’s a second act. And maybe it looks different than I pictured. Maybe it’s messier. But it’s mine. And it’s not too late to build something beautiful.
Moving Forward and NOT Feeling Behind in Life
Do you ever feel like you’ll never catch up in life? That your 40s, 50s or 60s are too late to attempt to get ahead if you weren’t already there?
If you’ve ever felt this way, I hope this post makes you feel a little less like that. And if you have tips on how to deal with feeling behind in life, I’d love to hear them. Drop a comment or send me a message. Let’s figure this out together.
You’re not too late. You’re just getting started.
Frequently Asked Questions
I always try to do a little research when I write my blog posts about the topic I’m addressing. It helps me to heal and stay informed and I like to pass on the information. Here are a few FAQs based on the topic in this blog post.
Is it normal to feel behind in life in your 50s?
Yes, it’s completely normal. Many women in their 50s feel like they’re not where they “should” be—whether financially, emotionally, or socially. Life doesn’t always follow a linear path, and midlife often brings unexpected changes that require us to adjust and reevaluate.
How do I deal with feeling behind in life in my 50s?
Start by acknowledging the feeling without judgment. Limit social media comparisons, focus on what you can control (like your habits and mindset), and take small steps toward what brings you joy. You’re not starting from scratch—you’re starting from experience.
Am I too old to start over after 50?
Not at all. Starting over after 50 is more common than most people realize. Whether it’s a new career, moving to a new town, or redefining your purpose, this season of life can be incredibly empowering—once you stop comparing it to someone else’s timeline.
What causes women in midlife to feel stuck or lost?
A lot of factors: divorce, empty nesting, career changes, burnout, health challenges, or unmet expectations. Combine that with society’s pressure to “have it all figured out,” and it’s no wonder many of us struggle with feeling behind in life during our 50s.
Resources
What does it mean to have a society with more older people than younger ones? Encore.org
Statistics that Show Women Over 50 Are the Perfect Entrepreneur The Middle Girls
Thank You for Stopping By!
Hi, I’m Allie, obsessed hiker, explorer of our world and reinventor of my life in my 50s.
Here at AllieRambles I explore what it means to rebuild and chase freedom in your 50s and beyond—because life doesn’t end at midlife, it begins.
I also write A LOT about being outdoors hiking, biking and paddling as much as I can – all over the United States and beyond.
Let’s wander, grow, and figure it out together.
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